In society, we are led to believe that it is morally unacceptable to think about
ourselves in a positive light. We hear and see things that lead us to believe that we are not
good enough, and that our flaws define the core of who we are as a human being. We seek
confirmation and acceptance from others, yet in our heads, we are our biggest criticizers.
This mentality is one of the reasons why so many of us have insecurities about
ourselves. Almost always, it is not what others are saying that is fueling these insecurities;
Instead, it is the voice inside our heads that is constantly pointing out and reminding us of
our supposed imperfections. We need to take control of this inner voice and learn to truly
love ourselves because if we don’t, we will never be able to live a truly fulfilling life. In my
self-love journey, I learned that there are specific steps that you should take to be able to truly love yourself.
First, you need to surround yourself with people that bring you up. They are the ones
that will be there for you when you fall, and the ones that will believe in you even when you
don’t. Secondly, you need to take control of your inner voice. This is the voice that we all use to talk to ourselves in our heads that we are not fully aware of. Whenever you’re
saying something negative to, think “stop.” Thirdly, replace that thought with something more positive, and keep doing that for every negative thought that occurs.
At first, you won’t believe in that positive message that you just told yourself, but over time
you will start to believe in it. Lastly, you need to come face to face with your
insecurities. Schedule a time for yourself where you can just sit, and write down
everything that you hate about yourself and reflect on what caused this hatred. You need
this time of self-reflection to be able to come to terms with yourself.
This whole process of learning to love who you are is like learning a new yoga pose. You
practice countless times to try to get into that one pose. You fail over and over again and it
seems like you will never be able to do the pose. Then, one day you can get into this
pose and from that moment on, you remember how to do it. Occasionally, you might
lose your balance, but you know what it feels like to be in the pose and you can try again.
This journey will be difficult and will be different for everyone. However, I urge you all to embark on this journey because all of you deserve much more than you are willing to give